The "Aw Naw!" of The Week

I love video games. I play them a lot, I enjoy them a lot, and I buy a decent number of them. However, a video game is my first ever 'Aw Naw' of the week, and that game is Deus Ex-Human Revolution.

This game has been well reviewed (IGN) for its 'story', graphics, and 'gameplay options'. Lets talk about these point by point.

The story: corporations are evil blah blah ethics of human enhancement blah blah. Nothing original, nothing surprising, and certainly nothing to keep you hooked. Oh, you can get more story if you do sidequests and hack 50 billion computers and PDAs, but pressing the square button gets old after awhile. Let's think about this: you have a 'great story' that requires me to double my playing time through super-repetitive actions to get the whole shebang? No. You did that wrong. The only way I can agree with reviewers on the story point is if they have never seen tv, movies, or read a book. There's no way they could enjoy this and think it's great unless it's the only game they've ever played.

Graphics: The people look good, but that's pretty common now. The buildings look like ones in the first deus ex but with better lighting. Apparently the architecture of the future is bland stacked on bland with neon rope lighting. It's like hookers coming off a bad trip designed the things. This game is played in first person view and walking makes things look awful. Blur effects make it look like you don't want to render, not like I'm moving.

Gameplay Options: Choose the way you want to play! To quote the great Seanbaby, "I have fewer bullets than there are bad guys and I die in one hit. Deus Ex seems pretty sure I'll 'choose' stealth.". That's right. There are multiple ways to the play the game, it's just that it's do I sneak in the sewers, do I sneak in the air vents, or do i sneak from room to room. Top of the uber stealth of it all with terrible, terrible conversations and interrogations and this game just is not fun to play.

It looks bad, it reads bad, it plays bad. So I'm telling you this week: If someone wants you to get Deus Ex : Human Revolution just say "Aw Naw!"